halloween snow

it's halloween evening and is snowing lightly outside. i'm blessed to live in a rural enough area where we don't get kids coming to the house for candy.  maybe parents don't let the kids wander the neighborhood at night because of the bears.  not that i dislike the holiday or kids, i'd just rather not get up and answer the door every two minutes.  it's also the first time in my life that i'm not excited about snow falling.  i don't have 4wd, my driveway is a fairly tricky stretch of gravel to navigate when it's covered in snow, and i have surgery scheduled at 7:30a wednesday morning and am in no condition to crawl around on the ground putting chains on my back tires so that i can get to the surgery center on time.
i'm looking forward to surgery.  this hunk of cartilage has been pushing on my nerve for too long now.  my pain levels have been fairly high the past few weeks.  that, combined with my mom's aneurysm a bit more than two weeks ago and continued comatose state, has left me very unmotivated and uninterested in maintaining either my website or this blog lately.  i realize that i just sent them both out into the world recently and should be updating both regularly, but they're difficult to care about at the moment.  i did spend some quality time with my camera last week on a sunny morning and everything was covered with drops of water from the overnight rain.  i'm thankful that i have photography because it's one of the few experiences that provides me with mental flow, that singular, meditative state of mind while i'm composing shots.  nothing else enters my mind during those moments, and i needed that for a few minutes this past week.

i'm sure that once i've had and recovered from surgery, and mom is closer to waking from her coma and on the road to her her recovery, i'll find more time and space to spend with my camera.  i'm short on inspiration right now, and am not going to push to find it. i'm just not in the mood.